The Ashley is praying to the Paradise Baby Jesus that these knuckleheads are done harping on the Joe/Samantha/Juelia storyline. Please let someone get stung by a jellyfish in the crotch tonight! That’s all I’m asking for! I deserve it after watching this crap twice a week!
The episode starts off with recap of last night’s breakups: Joe was dumped by Samantha, and Ashley I. was kicked to the curb by Jared.
Ashley and Joe decide that misery loves company, so they grab a few bottles of tequila, a bunch of Kleenex and go sit together to talk about how the people they are obsessed with no longer like them. Ashley starts blubbering like she found out that the Kardashians’ show got cancelled. This ridiculously absurd display of emotion creeps Joe out, and he basically tells her that he’s not much for the tears and whatnot.