Post Tagged with: "Recaps"

‘True Tori’ Season Finale Recap: Pigging Out & Playing the Victim

"Stop going to the hospital. STOP GOING TO THE HOSPITAL!"

“Stop going to the hospital. STOP GOING TO THE HOSPITAL!”

By Holly Rasmussen

On the season finale of True Tori, Tori projects her feelings onto a five-day-old pig. Yes, a  baby pig. Tori brings the little swine home out of the blue. In the last episode she and Dean were fighting over the fact that he invited a woman friend from rehab over to their house to babysit the kids while Tori was gone. I mean, why not let a strange woman that’s straight outta rehab watch the kiddies?! What could go wrong with that air-tight plan?

To sum up: Tori’s marriage is crumbling. Her husband is bringing home strange women. She has four small children. Why not add a newborn pig to the slop-pit that Tori’s life has become?!

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‘Kendra On Top’ Season Finale Recap: Tabloid Hate & the Big Date

Kendra On Top

“Don’t say anything! Save it to sell to the tabloids!”

Note: The Roundup’s ‘Kendra On Top’ recapper, Holly, was busy giving birth to a baby when this aired last week. She’s back now, so here’s the recap of the season finale!

By Holly Rasmussen

It’s the season finale of Kendra On Top, which means we will (hopefully) learn “the truth” about what happened with Hank’s alleged affair. As you may remember from the last episode, as soon as Kendra got home from visiting her dad in Costa Rica she found out that her mom, Party Patti, once again sold her out to the media. Patti apparently got mad that Kendra decided to go visit her father so instead of discussing the issue with her daughter like a normal person, she took to social media to say Kendra betrayed her. Of course she did.

Anyway, once Kendra gets home from her trip, she finds out that her manager wants her to meet with a producer from Australia to get involved with some television shows there. She says she has to do this because she has “mouths to feed” and…God forbid she actually has to get a real job.

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‘Kendra On Top’ Episodes 12 & 13 Recap: Getting Advice From the “Grand Dude” That Ditched You

kendra on top season 3

Nope…this photo wasn’t staged or anything…No way…

By Holly Rasmussen

This week Kendra on Top is coming to you from Costa Rica where Kendra is visiting her millionaire surfer nudist father, Eric. The episode starts out with Kendra meeting her father’s friends at dinner. They are a cast of characters. My favorite is Shlomy, an executive chef. Seriously, his name is Shlomy. During the dinner, Kendra finds out her and Naked Eric have many things in common…such as their penchant for saying the word, “dude.” Eric has decided his grandfather nickname will be “Grand Dude.” ["I'm not a regular grandfather, I'm a cool grandfather!"]

As we saw last week, Eric told Kendra she could invite Hank and Little Hank to come to Costa Rica to visit, as well. They arrive and it’s awkward. Kendra seems as if she’s about to cry at any moment. That’s a change. Usually it’s Hank that’s blubbering.

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‘True Tori’ Episode 4 Recap: Wheeling In the Ex-Wife for Extra Ratings

Dear God.

Dear God.

Note from The Ashley: Over here at The Roundup, we love us some trashy television, particularly any show that features someone with an “ugly cry face,” it seemed natural that we start recapping Tori Spelling’s train wreck of a reality show True Tori. It has everything we love in a reality show: shameless ploys for ratings, ridiculously staged meet-ups and, of course, people acting trashy! Holly will be taking the reins on recapping ‘True Tori’ for the most part, however The Ashley may have to sink her trash-TV-lovin’ claws into an episode or two for recapping!

By Holly Rasmussen

On this episode, Tori decides to meet up with Dean’s first wife…you know, the one he was married to while he was boinking Tori. She said she hopes to get “closure” from this meeting (or ratings, same thing.) It seems she will also attempt to make Dean’s son 16th birthday about her. It’s always about her.

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‘Kendra On Top’ Episodes 10 & 11: Reconnecting with Dear Old (Deadbeat) Dad

This week on Kendra on Top, Kendra heads to Costa Rica to visit her nudist father! Finally, something interesting is happening. We are all so tired of seeing Hank mope around the whole episode, every episode.

Raise your hand if you want this photo made into a T-shirt.

Raise your hand if you want this photo made into a T-shirt.

This episode starts out with Kendra and Hank blubbering at couple’s therapy. They still aren’t addressing his cheating scandal, of course, but Hank talks about he feels like he had to be perfect. He says that his stalled athletic career was a huge blow to his ego. Kendra says she does the miss the man she married because he was confident and successful (and didn’t have to televise his therapy to make money, I assume).

Kendra’s friend Jessica drives her to the airport and discusses Hank’s identity crisis with her. Kendra says her marriage was headed for trouble even before the scandal happened. She said Hank was having anxiety attacks and was very unhappy that his football career ended. Kendra believes this contributed to everything that has been going on.

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‘Kendra On Top’ Episodes 8 & 9 Recap: Family Fun at the Playboy Mansion

"Oh, I could tell you some stories about your mommy!"

“Oh, I could tell you some stories about your mommy!”

By Holly Rasmussen

Kendra is back for another episode of this train wreck she calls a reality show. On this episode of Kendra On Top, Kendra, her friend Jessica, and Kendra’s kids are on their way to visit Kendra’s ex-boyfriend, Playboy founder Hugh Hefner. Kendra is talking to Jessica about how when she met Hef. Apparently she was a stripper and only owned two dress because “strippers don’t need clothes.” Well, that’s appropriate to be discussing in front of your young son. She should probably save that for Little Hank’s next bedtime story!

Kendra talks about how much she loved her time at the mansion.

“I didn’t go to college. I went to the Playboy Mansion,” she said.

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