In case you haven’t been paying attention (because, you know, you have a life and stuff), Amber Portwood (affectionately known over on The Roundup as AMBO for her Rambo-like aggression), decided that she needed to take some naked photos of herself on her phone (as you do). Unfortunately, she sent them off to someone who decided to release them online.

The photos show a naked Amber (I’ll allow you a moment to digest that before I continue.) The terrifyingly large Baby Leah tattoo is shown smiling from her abdomen. I think I’ll have nightmares about that.

If you want to see more of them you can check them out here. I don’t want to post them for fear that my site will get taken down for pornography, or that my readers will get physically sick to their stomach.

Anyway, the photos are real. AMBO has commented that she is humiliated by the photo leak.

“It makes me sad that anyone would do this, and I’m horrified that something so private is being shared publicly. It’s been a difficult year, and I just want to focus on what’s important in my life — my daughter. (…) Those pics were taken for personal reasons. I didn’t send them to anyone. I didn’t take them for sexual reasons. This is embarrassing enough. It’s just weird. The person who did this is f**ked.”

Um…you didn’t take them for sexual reasons? Why else do you take nude photos on your phone? To examine yourself? Perhaps to admire your creepy tattoo?

So who leaked the photos? AMBO insists it wasn’t baby-daddy Gary. My bets are on her ex-boyfriend Clinton (a.k.a. Daddy Long-Legs…read about that here)  or AMBO herself. She’s always said she wants to be the next Marilyn Monroe, and that she wants to be in Playboy.

“No, no, Gary didn’t do it,” she told OK! Magazine. “He wasn’t around me because of the no contact order when I took those pictures, but there were a bunch of people who were and I’m sure I know who it was.”

The photos are relatively recent then. It’s nice that AMBO can take time out of her busy schedule of beating people up and slugging back cheap vodka to take some nudie cutie photos.