MTV has gifted us with an supersized sneak peek of Teen Mom 2 Season 9. On Monday, the network released a very extended clip of the new season, featuring three of the show’s five stars: Chelsea Houska, Leah Messer and Jenelle Evans. (Surely we can expect clips of Kail Lowry and Briana DeJesus shortly.)
Just like the last season of Teen Mom OG, this new season of ‘Teen Mom 2’ will be full of girls having babies, moving into huge houses and fighting with their exes. (Of course, we will have to trade Butch Baltierra for Barbara Evans, but The Ashley‘s OK with that…)
In case you aren’t able to squirrel away over seven minutes during work hours to watch the preview, (or you’re in another country and can’t watch the clip), allow The Ashley to recap the clip for you…
Chelsea is living life with her kids, Aubree and Watson (and Layne, who hadn’t shot out of Chelsea’s baby-maker at the time the trailer was filmed). She and her husband Cole have just purchased a new house on a large piece of land. (This is not to be confused with The Land, of course…)
The house appears to be a supersized version of Chelsea’s original log cabin, and it’s apparently filled with those annoying wall stickers that say “inspirational” things, which annoys Chelsea. She wastes no times clawing down the “Be true to who you are and the family name that you bear” saying on the front wall. (Who can blame her? That sounds like a saying that came straight out of Leah’s “Live Your Standard” lipstick seminar!)
Chelsea gives Producer Mandi a tour of the new log cabin mansion. Producer Mandi “oohs” and “aahs” at all the rooms and remodels that Chelsea has planned (while silently cursing the fact that she used those stupid Trojans in high school, thus preventing herself from getting pregnant, getting on MTV and getting a log cabin mansion of her own.)
They then go outside to marvel at the quietness of their land (again, not to be confused with The Land, where the screams of rakin’ men and children cryin’ for food can be heard on the regular.)
Chelsea loves that there are no people around their new house.
“I don’t understand how people wouldn’t want to live wide open!” she proclaims.
(Ironically, the fact that Chelsea and the other girls lived “wide open” during their teens is the reason they’re on this show and can buy these mega-mansions!)
Next we check in with Leah and her girlseseses. Leah (who is looking hotter than a potful of canned raviolis, y’all!) is enjoying the company of a new gentleman caller named Jason.
She tells Jason that her girls like him.
“How can they not?” he replies.
(Well, he’ll fit right in with all the other big-headed dads on this show!)
In the next scene, Leah (dressed like a summertime streetwalker whose rent is due the next day) goes to visit her friend Meg.
Who is this “Meg” character? What happened to Leah’s trusty and mulleted friend Kayla?!
AND WHAT OF MAMA DAWN!? Where is she at these days?! I miss her convos with Leah (not to mention her frequent confusing of the words “were” and “was.”)
Meg invites Leah to “set” down so they can catch up.
Meg, who has the personality of a cardboard cut-out, tells Leah that she has been working constantly. Leah, who has no clue what that would be like, quickly blows off Meg’s boring life so she can talk about her own new boyfriend.
Leah explains that she and Jason met “through a mutual friend” (sooooo….Tinder or Plenty of Fish), and that he has…wait for it… A STEADY JOB!
While Leah’s man is older— at 39— she says it’s better because he “gets” her life.
After all, she says, it ain’t easy to find someone who is OK with a girl having three kids by two different dads and two divorces under her belt.
Jason has a kid of his own, as well as two failed marriages, so he understands Leah. She says that she did inform Corey Tyler and Jeremy Lynn that she had a new man and that the girlseses would be around him.
Things is well, y’all!
Also “well” is Jenelle and David. (Well…according to Jenelle, anyway…)
She’s still upset that David is not allowed to film for the show. She is also mad that Baby Daddy No. 2, Nathan, was upset when he allegedly found bruises on their kid, Kaiser. (This is, of course, what caused the big custody saga that took place between Jenelle and David, and Nathan and his mom last summer. You can read all about that here!)
Luckily (for us, anyway), Jenelle’s mom Barbara is back in her life. They traipse out to a random bench in a random park (because nobody is going to set foot on The Land to film).
Barb says she’s happy that her and Juh-nelle are getting along now, which Jenelle attributes to Barb no longer “being mean to David.” Barb says they started to mend their relationship around the time that Nathan and Doris kept “Kaisa” from Jenelle.
Jenelle says that Nathan kept Kaiser from her “for no reason,” and that David already explained to Nathan that the bruises found on the boy were from a slip-n-slide, and not from him.
“Nathan is trying to do everything in his power to sabotage my husband!” Jenelle wails. “And everyone wonders why my husband acts the way he does and freaks out the way he does! It just pisses me off the way everyone thinks about David.
“He doesn’t do anything wrong and does everything in his power to make our family happy,” Jenelle says as she cries. “For everyone out there who wants to hate on David, David is not a bad guy!”
Barb is just sitting there with a weird look on her face. She’s either trying to figure out if Jenelle is talking in code and really trying to tell her to help her escape, or if they’re on some sort of hidden camera show or something.
You can watch the clip yourself below! The new season of ‘Teen Mom 2’ premieres January 14 on MTV!
RELATED STORY: EXCLUSIVE! ‘Teen Mom 2′ Crew Members Are Refusing to Work on Jenelle Evans’ Shoots Because They’re Afraid of Her Husband David Eason
(Photos: MTV)
43 Responses
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Leah “looking hotter than a potful of canned raviolis, y’all!” is some of the funniest shit I have ever read. Stifling laughter at my desk. She does look great though! So much healthier than she has in past seasons.
Ashley, did you see Jenelle’s interview with Us Weekly? She breaks down why she called 9-11 and says David was not abusing her and it was a big misunderstanding (even though she is crying in the 9-11 call that her husband abused her). What *really* happened was they were fighting and she accidentally fell into a hole, then David fell into the hole too. I saw it posted on Reddit and thought it was a joke at 1st. I’ve heard the domestic abuse excuse “Oh it’s nothing, I just tripped” before, but falling into holes with your husband is a new one. I’m really confused about how I feel because obviously no one deserves to be in a situation like that, but gosh dangit Leah I wish she would get herself some help with that $. Kids don’t deserve this stuff!
Why the hell is Jeremy’s middle name “Lynn”?
I’m almost positive that’s Butch’s middle name too. I swear I remember reading that his birth name is
Darl Lynn. I’ve never heard it used as a male middle name until TM.
What in the chocolate scented magic marker preschool stencil hell is going on with Jennelle’s brows in that last picture of her?
Must be her JE Cosmetics brow kit ?
LOL!
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You always crack me up! Hilariously accurate in your descriptions of the cast of teen mom series. Keep up the highly entertaining pieces please!
Had me laughing out loud — at work— Street walker with rent due !!!! too funny
Why couldnt Nathan just call Jenelle
Oh wait nevermind…the control freak would fill the streets with uppercuts
I saw comments (not here) that Barb was shit-talking Doris, which is why I watched. I didn’t get that impression at all. She said she never thought she would just keep him and that violates the visitation order. It’s clear that Barb knows David is a POS and I didn’t see her express any doubt about Doris and Nathan. I think Barb is way too forgiving of Jenelle, but she doesn’t seem to have changed her mind about David. I’m sure Jenelle will be mad at Barb again once the season actually airs and Barb says the “wrong” thing.
Also, looks like this was filmed right after the 911 call, hence the high neck tank and hair covering her collarbone. Wonder if Barb knew yet.
Forgot to add, there is no way Nathan could just text David and Jenelle asking about the bruise. Jenelle blocked his number and David is a hothead who would have exploded. They act like we haven’t been watching their bullshit.
Nathan cant call or text David because, he will take them talking words as fighting words & fill the streets with uppercuts. But he wont fight Corey ok David
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I’m pretty sure this was before the 911 call. But I wouldn’t be surprised if she was hiding other bruises.
I feel like Barb is playing nice because she knows David is a ticking time bomb and wants Jenelle to feel like she can reach out to her should anything happen.
Is Jenelle disappointed that Chelsea didn’t buy sinking swamp laaand too?
Is Jenelle waiting for Cole to abuse Aubree and his own kids and get weekly visits from CPS and the police?
Never gonna happen. These people are worlds apart and shows what happens when you wait for a good, quality, respectful man.
P.S. Love Barb’s face in that convo, she’s like, “Am I being punk’d? ‘My husband’ is a good man? She’s high, right?”
By implication, the following are not within David’s power:
1. Holding a full-time job.
2. Acting like a decent, pleasant person on Twitter.
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I hate Chelsea, she’s so annoying and that fkn baby voice, that cole has also adopted, since marrying that.
Please go away, your the only normal family in this franchise, just go live your life in peace, I’m so over this fkn show.
Barbara isn’t buying Jenelle’s BS. It’s written all over her face. lolol She may have actually been surprised that Doris/Nathan kept Kaiser without an emergency legal order in place, but I bet she was ok with it for safety reasons. I’m sure she has wanted to do the same, but knows she has to abide by the schedule. Barbara is going to be acquiescent when dealing with Jenelle because she DOES want a relationship with her daughter and they DO have an MTV contract to abide by. Without Barbara, Jenelle has nobody to film with and Barbara knows this. Barbara will do this to salvage Jenelle’s future hoping she sees the light before David bleeds her dry.. Mothers do that; always holding out hope. I don’t for a minute think her feelings have changed about David because she’s witnessed that boob in action a hell of a lot more than even we know about. I hope Barbara has her own therapist to help guide her through this minefield in dealing with the creatures of the Land.
Exactly we didn’t see any holiday pictures with Barb at the land playing happy family did we?
On an unrelated note, Dakota Meyer from TMOG got a Keith Urban haircut.
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@theashley To be fair, Jeremy and Corey have had stable jobs. It’s kind of sad that she has to mention that at all though. And the guy that she’s with obviously has issues (I mean look up his social media video, and his appearance in the preview alone, is very telling). Hopefully her girls won’t have the daddy issues that she suffers from, and will have at least slightly more healthier relationships than the examples she shows them.
I’m glad that Chelsea, Cole, and the children are supposedly happy and well. Of course, we don’t know what the truth is behind closed doors. But I certainly hope it’s as healthy as can be. She obviously loves her children and would do anything for them.
As for Jenelle (Jesus H. Christ!), one can easily tell that she’s lying and nervous about the fact that David is an abusive, psychotic, piece of garbage because she immediately begins to cry and pull/play with her hair (which is a telling sign of a lie) when talking about how David is a “good person.” There have been many signs pointing to abuse and neglect towards her and her kids. It’s awful. I myself have been a victim of abuse, sadly this has happened several times in my life. But the thing is, I knew I needed to get help, psychologically. And I still am. I couldn’t victimize myself any longer. The worst part is, she victimizes her kids by allowing him to discipline them with his sick and twisted ways. Those kids feel guilty by just expressing their sadness and concern, and one can tell when Jace literally tells her that he doesn’t want her to marry that jerk. Then as he sees her faces and hears nothing but silence, he says, “I’m just kidding,” because he feels he needs her approval. How f***ing sad is that? I honestly don’t even like Nathan, and I think he’s awful for putting his kid in the middle of all the bulls*** just like Jenelle and David do, however I still think that his dumb ass is a better parent than those two insane assh**** could ever be.
Jenelle, can you just tell us one more time who David is? Not sure if you said that he’s your husband or not ? love how Jenelle took a jab at Barb saying that she is “mean” to David. B*tch please.
As for Chelsea’s new home (good for her and Cole, they seem to be the smartest and most money wise couple on the show) how long will it take for Jenelle to say that Chelsea copied her, buying land to live on?
There goes Jenelle again…defending her ass clown husband…talkin bout he’s not a bad guy…I dunno who this girl is trying to convince?? Us? MTV?? Herself?? It’s so pathetic.
Jenelle might have borderline personality disorder. It would make sense why she defends every man she’s with until they’re broken up, then they were terrible. Also would explain her being as emotional as she is and being prone to addiction.
Might? Oh definitely. Kail and Amber claim it, but Jennelle and Farrah epitomize it.
An ad for a pest exterminator came up right after the section about David. I’ve never seen a more appropriate internet ad in my life ?
Yes cause Cole prefers dead deer everywhere.
The last few seasons I’ve been losing interest in this show. This season I won’t be tuning in. This show is way over due for retirement. Yawn!
I was dead a** crying at the shot of Barbara. Totally trying to figure out if there’s a hidden escape request in there ?
It’s weird how many times Jenelle says “my husband” when talking to her mom. I don’t know about other people but when I’m talking to my mom about my husband I use his name. My mom already knows he’s my hubby
I feel like she’s trying so hard to prove that she’s in a “good, stable” relationship and she has to constantly remind everyone she has a husband now and not just a boyfriend. She’s so dramatic ?
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Dramastic you mean? Lol. Yeah, she’s not fooling anyone but herself. Actions speak louder than words and David is nuts!
She has also talked about herself in the third person when fighting with her mom, so I’m not surprised anymore.
She basically acts as a teenager who likes to say she has a boyfriend every time even if no one asks her. She hasn’t matured at all!
barb has aged terribly, it is all fake, she wants kaiser away from them as much as everyone else. Such bullshit. And Chelseas house looks like a bad plastic cubby house lol
Oh hi Jenelle.
Hi Jenelle!
Jenelle’s scene is like having deja vu. For 8 or 9 years now, we’ve seen her do the same thing with every guy she’s ever been with. Everyone sees the abuse and the toxicity in her relationships but Jenelle just acts like everyone is crazy and her and her man are perfect. She defends him. She makes excuses for him. She worships him….until they break up. Then she acts like he’s the worst person in the world. She did it with Andrew. She did it with Kiefer. She did it with Gary. She did it with Courtland. She did it with Nathan. Now she’s doing it with David. It’s the same old cycle and this is exactly why Jenelle is not fit to be a parent. She is too delusional to see she is addicted to abuse and dysfunction.
?
Errrr, where’s Briana?
They didn’t show Kail either. It was just clips of Jenelle, Leah & Chelsea.
@Candlelitgranolabars don’t look a gifted horse in the mouth 😉 I myself am quite pleased to not see or hear anything from Briana and/or Kail in the preview 🙂