Mercifully there are only a few episodes left of this season of Teen Mom: Young & Pregnant. This episode is a “Very Special Episode” where all the girls will be meeting up and filming together. (It’s kind of like those crossover episodes of Full House where Steve Urkel randomly came to town.)
Anyway, this week’s episode kicks off in Virginia, where Kiaya reveals she and the other ‘Young and Pregnant’ moms will be heading to LA for a photoshoot to promote the new season of their show. However, the five moms were feuding in a group chat just days before so everyone is expecting things to pop off in LA.
Prior to the LA trip, Kiaya and Kayla talk over FaceTime and Kayla makes it known that she’s looking forward to the upcoming trip, but is not excited about seeing Rachel or Madisen.
Kayla fills viewers in on the messiness that went down in the group chat, which she says began when Rachel told the other girls she was considering skipping the trip in order to celebrate her birthday elsewhere. She also mentions that Madisen threw a few insults towards the other girls during the feud, which landed her a spot on Kayla’s s**t list, too. (Presumably right behind Rachel and Noopie.)
We next head down to Arkansas, where Madisen, Christian and Camille are visiting. Since she and Christian have broken up and are no longer going to Poundtown, Madisen is staying with her friend Autumn, while Christian has retreated to his family’s house.
As Autumn is talking to Camille about how she keeps fleas off her cat (um?), Madisen starts yapping about Christian. She tells Autumn (and the cat, who is just sitting there in all his flea-covered glory) that she plans to leave Camille in Christian’s care while she goes to LA. She knows that Christian doesn’t really know how to care for the kid but she wants him to figure it out.
Autumn seems to be jealous of Madisen. (I suppose I would be too if I were stuck scratching myself in a flea-covered cabin in Arkansas, while my friend gets to jet-set it out to Los Angeles, all because she let some caveman stick his ding-dong in her and she got knocked up.)
Madisen tells Autumn that she’s nervous to meet the other ‘Teen Mom’ girls face-to-face, especially after their recent group chat bickering. Madisen makes it clear, though, that she is there to soak up the sun and not square up and rip the fake eyelashes off these other broads.
“I don’t have any plans for any type of beefin’ or scrappin’,” Madisen says. “I’m just gonna match energies.
“If you don’t like me, it’s because you don’t like yourself,” she adds.
Luckily, Madisen and Rachel have made up since their fight at Hazmat’s birthday party, so Madisen knows that she’ll at least have one Beaver on her side if the group starts “beefin'” while in LA.
Madisen calls up Rachel to talk crap on the other girls, and Rachel says she’s not going to be fake-nice to Kayla, especially after Kayla called her cheap and said she was on crack.
With that, our crew of birth-control-challenge broads heads out to meet up in California!
Soon, all the girls have arrived in Los Angeles. Rachel clomps her space boots into the hotel, ready to fight, but luckily the other girls are already in their hotel rooms unpacking their Fashion Nova frocks from their suitcases.
Brianna goes to see Kiaya and Kayla in their room, while Madisen visits Rachel’s room. Rachel is just sitting on her bed, dressed up like she’s about to film Hello Kitty p0rn.
Everyone is hoping that they can squash their “beef” at dinner and focus on the fact that they’re getting a free gourmet meal on MTV’s dime, and for once they don’t have to argue about meat packs with their baby daddies.
What a time to be alive!
All the girls arrive at the restaurant, and it’s AWKWARD. Everyone seems to be trying to decide if they should throw down, or just say screw it and split the calamari appetizer.
Rachel doesn’t even wait until the waters have been delivered to dive right into the group chat mess. She tells them that it’s “all positivity” on her end from here on out, and Brianna agrees that everyone was being a crapnugget in the chat.
Rachel, in a rare moment of self-awareness, even tells the girls that she realizes that, lately, she’s been in “too many misunderstandings” and she needs to work on not popping off so much. However, she does confront Kayla for calling her “cheap.” (For some reason, Rachel isn’t even offended that Kayla basically called her a crackhead.)
Kayla apologizes for saying Rachel was cheap or whatever, but reminds Rachel that she was poking the beaver bear by attacking Kayla first.
Kiaya tries to grab hold of the conversation before it turns into a mud wrestling match right there in the restaurant’s dining room, but Rachel is already starting to raise her voice. Then Madisen jumps into it, and Kiaya reminds her that she said something about their kids (or something…I really have no idea what these people are arguing about. Why aren’t they milking that MTV per diem for everything it’s worth instead of worrying about each other? I’d eat with Stalin if it got me free mozzarella sticks and a margarita.)
Everyone is talking over each other, and fluttering their spider lashes, and finally Rachel stands up, declaring that she “doesn’t owe anyone at this god damn table anything!” She tells them to stop ganging up on her. She grabs her space boots and stomps off, declaring, “I don’t got time for a back-and-forth with a bitch I don’t even wanna be friends with!”
That leaves Madisen alone with the three other girls, so she tries to make amends the best she can. They agree to squash their beef (packs) for now, and soon the conversation moves to Kayla’s engagement to Luke. Once Kayla admits that they’re engaged but miserable and probably going to break up (and stuff), Madisen jumps in, relating Kayla’s troubles to her own situation with Christian.
They try to include Brianna in the conversation but after she declares that she’s still “single as a Pringle,” I basically had to stop listening.
They “cheers” to Rachel and vow to enjoy their free trip to LA.
The next day is Rachel’s 20th birthday and she is ready to party! They will be doing a photoshoot for the new season and then going on a boat ride to “bond.” Madisen explains to Rachel that she needs to shut her trap every once in a while and let someone else have a chance to scream at everyone.
Madisen explains that there are very few girls who got knocked up as teens and then got on an MTV reality show for it, so they should be bonding together instead of “beefin’.”
The girls head back to their hotel to reapply their Wet ‘n’ Wild eyeliner and get ready for the photoshoot. Madisen is nervous, because she’s never done a photoshoot before. With a little coaching, though, she does fine.
Next up is Kayla, who struts through the photoshoot wearing a bright yellow dress that screams “He not gonna leave me! He love me!”
Brianna goes next. They do their best to make her look exciting, even sending in a guy to hold a mini leaf blower to blow air at her.
Kiaya and Rachel go next (with Rachel modeling her black space boots). Then the girls all awkwardly pose together. Everyone is holding onto each other in strange ways and it honestly looks like one of those posters they put in airport bathroom stalls encouraging you to report human trafficking.
To make things even weirder, they give all the girls sippy cups to hold in the air. (What the actual f**k is happening here?)
Finally they have all the girls aggressively scream into the camera and then, mercifully, the photoshoot is over.
Following the cast photoshoot, Kiaya meets up with Rachel at the hotel to find out what she missed after her early exit from dinner (i.e. find out who was talking crap on her).
Instead of spilling the tea, Kiaya tells Rachel about Zay’s upcoming release from prison. Rachel asks if Kiaya believes that Zay intends on walking the straight and narrow after his release, and Kiaya says she hopes Zay doesn’t fall back into the same patterns that caused him to be locked up in the first place.
Having dealt with a baby daddy behind bars herself, Rachel says Hazelee’s dad, Drew, tends to get mixed up with the wrong crowd any time he’s not living that three-hots-and-a-cot life.
Next, it’s time for the gals to go boating. Everyone has squashed the beef, Rachel is wearing her pink space boots and they’re all dressed in the finest beachwear Shein makes. It’s party time!
Kayla has to take a break from having a “la-dee-dah time” (you know you read that in Barbara‘s voice, didn’t you?) because her mom, Jaime, and Luke call her very upset. Kayla’s son Izaiah then calls Kayla crying, saying he doesn’t want to go back to Luke’s sister’s house.
After the phone call, Kayla tells the gals that Jaime went to go pick up the kids at Noopie‘s house, only to find out that Noopie had shuttled the kids over to Luke’s sister, Chasity‘s house without permission.
She says Jaime then went to Chasity’s house, where the kids bolted out of the house faster than Kieffer when he hears police sirens.
“Izaiah’s screaming and my mom’s like, ‘What is going on?!'” Kayla tells the girls, adding that when they arrived at Jaime’s home, she discovered that Izaiah was wearing a pull-up diaper, despite the fact that he’s been potty-trained for a while.
“He’s like, ‘Well I had a little bit of an accident. So Titi Chaz made me wear a diaper,'” Kayla said, adding that Izaiah didn’t want to put underwear back on because he was scared. “He was screaming like, ‘I don’t want to wear underwear because I don’t want to get hit!’
“The first thing he says on the phone, he was crying, was ‘Titi Chaz hit me.'”
Later in the episode, Kayla told the girls that Luke had recently been speaking to his mom Noopie again, which made them feel OK leaving the kids with Noopie. She said that Luke called Noopie about Izaiah claiming that Chasity hit him, and Noopie denied it.
“I don’t know if she’s trying to say Izaiah’s lying or my mom, or that they’re both lying. Chasity’s saying nothing happened,” Kayla said.
Since there’s nothing Kayla can do while she’s on a boat, they all just start taking selfies of themselves for the ‘Gram (as you do). They give Rachel a birthday cake and listen as she makes yet another random speech.
After the boat ride, Kayla calls up Luke to see what in the holy hell is happening over there. As per usual, Luke is clueless. However, Kayla feels bad that Luke’s attempt to repair his relationship with his family has just been torpedoed.
The next day, the girls head down to the beach for some awkward yoga.
That’s all for this episode of ‘Teen Mom: Young & Pregnant!’ To read The Ashley’s recap of the previous episode, click here!
(Photos: MTV)
7 Responses
What….is a meat pack???
Rachael needs tips on how to apply make up, and briana always looks grubby and in need of a shower.
The leaf blower! Holy shit… YES! I want that dude *and* the leaf blower present at whatever MTV award ceremony is happening next.
Also pretty sure I saw a poster just as you described the group shot of the girls when I was lost trying to find my gate in the Atlanta airport last month. Spot on!
Have you seen pics of young Stalin?
We can skip the sticks.
Bahahahahaha great recap. Especially loved the image of mozza sticks with Stalin.
Okay… I haven’t watched the episode yet & don’t know if I even will but someone please tell me Rachael did not attempt to do yoga in her damn space boots??!!! That may not end well!!!!??
I haven’t seen that much eyeliner since my dog got lost at Sephora.