Tyler Baltierra is on a one-man mission to reform adoption (and get his bio daughter Carly’s parents Brandon and Teresa Davis to resume contact with him). During one of his online rants on Monday, the ‘Teen Mom’ dad talked to fans about the trauma that placing first daughter Carly for adoption has caused his wife, Catelynn Lowell, as well as their daughter Carly, who is now 15 years old.
“I’m doing this because I feel, in my heart, that I have traumatized Carly,” he said. “I was ignorant, and I didn’t know anything about adoptees and what they experience, and I feel that she is owed this explanation. She deserves this information. She deserves this truth. She deserves to…have the freedom to express whatever feelings she has around it, without the influence of the adoptive parents and without the influence of the birth parents.”
Tyler then asked fans to have more compassionate for Catelynn. He began to tear up as he spoke about how awful it was to watch Catelynn have to give Carly to Brandon and Teresa at the age of 16.
“To think about my wife having to be rolled out of the hospital in a wheelchair as she’s still bleeding and holding [Carly]—” Tyler said before sobbing. “She was a child, rolling down the street, not even on hospital grounds… [She had] this expectation of having this access [to Carly] and this open adoption experience, and trusting all the adults that were around us, telling us, ‘This is the right thing’ and ‘You’re doing such a good job’ and ‘What a gift you’re giving these people.’ It just kills me. It literally kills me.
“And to know that trauma that Cate had to go through— not only at home before Carly was born– but afterwards, and she was by herself and there was no support. How is that OK?”
Tyler went on to applaud Catelynn for continuing to appear on ‘Teen Mom’ and show the birthparent perspective of adoption.
“And then for [Catelynn] to continue to share her story, being vulnerable,” he said. “And then, for me— being young and naive and not even understanding the trauma and PTSD that comes with being a birth mother– not even a birthparent, I’m a father and I didn’t carry this baby— for her to have this trauma in her body, and then to have it reignited after having Nova and then having post-partum depression and not understanding why all this is coming up for her.”
He then expressed regret for how he treated Catelynn during her battle with post-partum depression following Nova’s birth.
“I didn’t know that birth mothers go through this when they had [more] children after relinquishing their first one… I was so ignorant and I didn’t understand and there were times where I was frustrated and I didn’t understand,” he said. “I didn’t go about it the right way. I wish I would have been more supportive with her during all that. She got ridiculed by the public by going and getting help. And even I at that time didn’t understand.”
“So, for her to just continue to share her story, and to be so vulnerable and to take all the brunt of all of this— I don’t care what anybody says about her. I think she is the strongest woman I’ve ever met in my life,” Tyler said, before asking fans for “more grace and understanding” for his wife.
“At the end of the day, she was failed. People failed her,” he said. “People failed her being a young daughter and a child in a crisis. That’s crazy…This is a lot. But this is reality. This is adoption, which is loss and trauma at all sides. I just ask that people be compassionate. Try to understand.”
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Tyler also spoke about how he and Cate had to battle their parents at the time of Carly’s adoption, as both Butch and April were against Carly being adopted.
“Me and Catelynn had to get guardian ad litem because we were minors,” Tyler said. “We technically couldn’t sign off on parental rights as minors without parental permission or whatever. We didn’t get that parent permission. Our parents actually fought us in court. They were withdrawn from drugs in the back of the courtroom trying to get us to stop doing what we were doing. So, we had to get guardian ad litem appointed to represent us.”
(Photos: Instagram; MTV)
48 Responses
I also think it’s complete bullshit C&T turned the comments off their IG. Like, in their mind it’s totally okay to force their bullshit ‘opinions’ down people’s throats but they refuse to hear that they’re wrong. Turds.
I mean.. he does have a point about Caitlyn. It is kinda crazy that everyone was praising her for placing Carly so she wouldn’t grow up in chaos while Cait was a teenager actively growing up in a chaotic and abusive situation.
Even crazier that C&T still chose to expos their kids to the chaos and abuse, letting April babysit drunk. Even Carly wasn’t totally spared the chaos, since C&T let April tag along to their meet ups.
Why did you move out and leave Cait alone with the girls?
Tyler needs to come out already, that cant be helping things, maybe thats why he’s ranting, because he is hiding who he really us.
Tyler, you told cait if she wanted to keep you, then she had to give up the baby, you have both had 15 years to get councelling and come to terms with this, once again tyler YOU didnt want the baby, so take a fkn long hard look at yourself, you also f a t shamed cait for years, with your snide, sarcastic fkn comments, dont blame b&t for your faults.
Neither you or caitlyn followed through on any of the promises you made to better your lives, you blamed butch and april for your trauma, yet dumped carly#2 on her when ever you could.
I really really liked you both 15 years ago, i felt so sad for you both, and thought omg how level headed you seemed and how mature you seemed, ofcourse you made a huge sacrifice in placing carly with a wonderful loving family, a loving stable normal home.
And now your actions and your behaviour led to the situation your in today.
I actually dispise you for how your acting, towards carlys PARENTS!!! Remember tyler you gave cail a choice keep the baby and lose you, or keep you and give up the baby, cait chose you.
Remember that, and reflect on your actions and do the right thing and STFU!!!!
Cait i meant sorry.
I feel like Tyler won’t stop until Carly comes out in public and says, “Hi Mom and Dad! I’m so happy to hear from you. Can I live with you? Can I finish school in your town?”
It’s like that’s not going to happen Tyler and it’s bullying to keep pushing. If Carly wanted to talk to y’all, she would. But I can TOTALLY see why she wouldn’t! Carly has her whole life ahead of her and can be anything she wants. Why go public and be harassed and scrutinized over every step she takes? Parents shouldn’t want that for their children. (hint, hint)
They are acting so crazy. I feel like they would throw all of Nova’s stuff out the window the second Carly said she would come to see them. They have to give Carly Nova’s room, throw some of the not Carly’s in the basement, or whatever, their small they can live in a closet.
Did you see Jace using Maryssa bedroom furniture?
I feel bad saying this because I don’t deny that anyone going through an adoption probably experienced some level of trauma surrounding the process, but damn do I feel such secondhand embarrassment for how these two handle themselves publicly
It’s beyond gross that sites are literally FILLED with the rantings of this lunatic as if the media exists solely to act as his source for his open journalesque whining to that child.
They’ve experienced a traumatic event in their lives. Okay? Lots of us out here have. At what point do they stop using that as a crutch for the bullshit and MOVE the fuck on? How many millions of dollars have they blown on stupid shit instead of getting real help for issues they consistently blame for their multitude of issues. Instead, they’re publicly attacking the parents of their biological daughter as if that is going to win them her favor at the magical age of 18. My prediction is that Carly tells these two to GTFO and that’ll set off a new “trauma event”, blaming BrandonandTeresa for brainwashing her. Wait for it. Hell, if they spend as much time making sure the daughters they DO have are happy, healthy and well balanced individuals as they do making sure their public trauma speaking over the “loss of Carly” is heard by all, I’d be shocked.
Stop giving these whacked out fucks a platform to cause emotional and mental trauma to Carly. Let him bitch into the abyss of his social media and stop feeding his ever-growing ego with the attention he does not deserve. Remember who pressured Cate the most into adoption.
Bruja.
Well said, and how are you keeping.
Hi you! I’m good, thank you! How are you? Getting ready for the holidays, which, holy shit this year went fast, are right around the corner? /hugs!
Tyler learnt a couple of therapy buzzwords and all of a sudden he thinks he’s a psychotherapist.
You aren’t responsible for the trauma inflicted upon you as a child, but you ARE damn sure responsible to heal from it and move on as an adult- instead of using it as an excuse to beat the issue into the ground. He needs to take some of this energy and heal- instead of ranting online. THAT is the issue here and I don’t know if they’ll ever understand that.
Tyler. Sweetheart. You need medication. Your bipolar is fucking you up. I get that you feel righteous and strong and on top of the world. But that is part of mania. Catelynn girl I know Tyler’s upward spiralling makes you feel lower. Get help again, too. You’ve dealt with people who make you feel small all your life. Tyler is toxic for you until he gets stable. But you should still leave him.
ok… their whole lives is full of adults who failed them when they’re kids…. but cmon they’re adults in their 30s now, it’s about time they stopped using it as an excuse & seek help/therapy to work through the ‘trauma’! like proper sessions not this mumbo jumbo rehabs. weekly or more than once a week sessions with someone who specializes in cptsd! but they don’t want to do that cuz then they can’t be victims on a tv show. but tbh if that was their storyline more than this bullshit it would be even better & maybe actually help others for once who sees someone else getting help & how it helps like they claimed they would 15yrs ago!!! but nope like i said once again then they can’t keep playing victims if they try to work through everything 🙄
“I have traumatized Carly”
It’s not the adoption that’s traumatized her. It’s this. This constant attention-seeking that targets her and her family that’s traumatizing her. He claims she can’t be hurt by what he’s saying because she doesn’t have social media and then turns around and says he’s doing this so that she knows “the truth” which mostly consists of wild speculation about her parents and her life. He clearly doesn’t care what effect this has on Carly. He keeps talking about vague general sentiments from some adoptees, but none of those people are Carly. He doesn’t know what she wants or how she feels because he is not her dad. This is honestly just cruel to Carly, who is the same age Cate was when she got pregnant. Tyler is the adult and he’s still acting as if he is 16. Let the kid live her life FFS.
These two have spend the last 20 years whining about their “trauma.” Instead of going to college and making something of themselves like they promised Carly. Cate spends her days gaining weight and googling Trauma Centers she can run off to while Ty messages men on Only Fans.
So bullying didn’t work. Now here comes the snivelling pity party. This is toxic.
Geez Ty. Did you forget the ultimatum you gave Cate if she chose to keep the baby?
Have you also ever considered that turning up with everyone who’s anyone in your family for YOUR visit with Carly might’ve turned B&T off? Especially when April rolls up half pissed.
Have a good hard look at your life and then ask the question again of why they’ve cut you off. They are doing it for the best interests of THEIR CHILD.
Carlyeserves to not have people to shoot all over her parents. Kate needs to get into therapy and work on this. She’s a thirty year old town woman. Grow the fuck up..
And stop blaming everything on the fact that you had a rough childhood. I had a rough childhood. I’m disabled because of my parents and i’m not a when you bitch like you tyler
For fucks sake! Trauma, trauma, trauma with these 2! Excuses, trauma, rehabs for trauma, blah blah blah. I’m not hating on anybody here (except these two), but seriously! Get over yourselves and move on! You did Carly a favor, you know you did.
Exactly. Just watch how Carly turns out, then watch how T. and C. kids turn out. PLEASE shut these two losers up by not putting out any of their lies anymore.
In Tyler’s first rant he said that “most” kids move out when they are 18 in alluding to Carly choosing to reunite with them when, in fact, most kids in Carly’s situation go to college at 18, yes, possibly leaving home to live on campus but not disconnected with her family. Tyler has zero regard for Carly as a person and for her future as an individual. Tyler has written negative things about her parents and has called them names like “childish.” I think her three sisters will be so jealous of the way Carly was raised when they are packing their suitcases, about to hit the streets at age 18.
You know, I hadn’t really thought about the 3 other sisters being jealous or resentful or of Carly but that very well maybe, especially Nova. T&C should be careful and cherish the ones at home.
Sooooomebosy take this mf social media away. He’s clearly unhinged & if it ain’t the most hypocritical thing for him to say B&T need to heal when clearly, Ty needs some heavy counseling.
Tyler loves to act like the second Cait gave birth B&T flipped the switch and said jk we’re not doing an open adoption. No, they gave them years of chances to prove that they could maintain a healthy relationship with both Carly and the adoptive parents and Cait and Tyler royally screwed it up. They admitted they hadn’t sent cards and kept in touch at one point and the visits were always messy. They don’t get to come and go in Carly’s life as they please and if B&T decide it is in the best interest of Carly to limit or stop communication with them then that is their prerogative. They are her parents and they get to decide what is best for Carly. C&T feel so entitled to whatever they want with B&T and their family, whenever it is convenient for them. Also the texts that Cait was sending to Teresa were awful! It sounded like non stop bragging, hey look at all this fun stuff we did without you Carly! I️ didn’t see a “how are you? How is school going? I’d love to hear about your friends. Are you playing any sports?” Breaks my heart for Carly. I️ commend B&T for doing what is best for a child, even knowing how much C&T will try to drag them for the whole world to see.
imagine not having even ONE 1️⃣ person in your life who cares enough to tell you to STFU and log off the internet…
#shutupscrotchin 🧔🏻🍆
#delusional
#clowns 🤡
Look, there IS trauma associated with all sides of adoption, absolutely! Especially in cases with the birth parent(s) desperately want to keep the baby. But these two twits make it really hard to acknowledge that, lol.
Fact is, BCS should have gotten them into therapy immediately, and that they apparently didn’t is CRAZY to me. It was never Brandon and Theresa’s responsibility to pay outside the adoption price tag for Cate to have “aftercare” (anyone else feel like they know a little too much about what the Baltierra’s get up to in the bedroom after this week?). That the agency (and fuckin’ Dawn) escape any and all public scrutiny from these two is, again, CRAZY. I understand that chaos demons made up most of the adults in C&T’s lives when Carly was born, and they viewed Dawn as the singular voice of calm and assisstance….but to have not moved beyond that in 15 years is really something to behold. Especially when it came out that BCS had a history of shady dealings.
That they bought therapy horses but apparently couldn’t shell out for some intensive therapy with that MTV money just showcases how irresponsible they STILL are. And they can’t blame that on Brandon & Theresa, either.
Nail on the head
In all these rants, Tyler never once mentions how he pressured Catelynn to give Carly up and threatened to leave her if she didn’t. I bet that was pretty traumatic for her.
I don’t remember him saying she had to give up the baby to be with him. I’m going to have to find that episode.
I know in Cate’s 16&Pregnant episode. Tyler says so many times that he only wants adoption. He says keeping the baby will “ruin us” to Cate. They won’t make it as a couple, they will hate each other. stuff like that.
He even when one of his friends said she would have gotten an abortion, he was like yeah that’s a much better idea. Cate was like 20+ weeks at that point, like a little too late, buddy.
He pretty much just kept saying over and over again that their home life was no place to raise a kid. I mean he was right Butch and April are addicts. Butch and April were violent. Tyler and Cate were juniors in hs, they didn’t even have homes at times, and they couldn’t rely on Butch and April for help.
Not once in any of these articles have I seen Cate or Ty take any accountability for their own actions. It’s all on B&T or their own parents. But never “we had no business being sexually active at 15 and if we had made different choices, this all could’ve been different. We did not consider the natural consequences of our actions” – literally ZERO accountability in the last 15yrs
Honestly.. teenagers make mistakes. We don’t think clearly when we’re that young. The real responsibility falls on Tyler and Caitlyn’s parents, because they were the adults throughout the entire situation. 16 year olds are so vulnerable, especially after going through a situation like this. It was c/T parents job to comfort and guide them. It was their parents job to push therapy, provide support. Not in any way is it B/T fault or responsibility. They are responsible for their child, Carly, just as C/T parents should have been responsible for them.
Amen.
I completely agree Sasha. He wants to say “we were just children being pressured to make a good decision about the pregnancy ” but never says maybe we shouldn’t have been doing adult activities in the first place.
I’m going to posit that no one has ever told Tyler “no” and meant it.
He is a petulant man child who is in full meltdown mode but since that hasn’t yielded the desired result, now he’s shifting his strategy.
Those poor, poor not-Carlys.
The grace you get is tied directly to the grace you give. These two have no idea what the word grace even means, let alone how to give it to others, there is little reason for anyone else to give them any. Although, they HAVE been given grace, years and years of it. They’ve also been given sympathy, empathy, time, counseling, encouragement, praise (for all sorts of things, including the fact that there was a time they dealt much better with everything and were willing to put in the work to do better and be better)
He really needs to stop, think, close his damn social media accounts, get some real help and real therapy for himself, for Cate and for the three girls they have. The damage he is doing will always far surpass the things he thinks he’s doing right. He’s just continuing to traumatize Carly, her parents, and Carly’s sisters. If that isn’t enough to get him to stop, he should realize he’s only creating more trauma for himself and Cate to deal with (arrogance tends to win out, so maybe he’ll eventually care about that damage).
Tyler needs to get a diary and get off his phone.
Trauma, trauma, trauma….. it really is his favourite word.
He can find so many people to blame, yet he forgets to mention that he pressured Cate like crazy to give Carly up.
Somebody said on the last post we needed to do a drink when he said the word ‘trauma’, lol
YOU failed her when you pressured her to give up Carly if she wanted to keep you.
Now get off the freaking internet and take some accountability for your actions.
Absolutely. The parents literally forbid them from placing her for adoption to the point that they tried to get custody. I’m not saying their parents were in the right state of mind to raise her, but perhaps they should’ve listened to their parents being that they had actually the experience. Cate and Ty were two young children having their first. I know I would never let my teen place my grandchild for adoption. Not while I was still living.
I’m not criticizing them for giving Carly up for adoption, don’t get me wrong. If they had normal parents maybe they would be able to raise her but Cate and Tyler’s parents were a couple of abusers and junkies. They absolutely abused their kids instead of supporting them and they were in no state of mind to raise a grandkid. I’m just saying that Tyler was who failed Cate the most by pressuring her to give up Carly and he plays dumb about it.
You’re asking us to give her grace when this “trauma” was YOUR FAULT?? You made her give up the baby!! It was all you Tyler! All you! And it’s still all about you! Give Carly some grace. Leave her family alone, stop giving your not-Carly’s false hope that they’ll be re-united with her. You’re the one torturing you children by promising them things you have no control over. They are WAY TO YOUNG to deal with this burden. Accept responsibility for what you’ve done and continue to do. You don’t even deserve your not-Carly’s!