“Totally!”
Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra have remained vocal about their personal struggles with adoption since placing their daughter Carly with her adoptive parents Brandon and Teresa Davis in 2009. In a new interview with USA Today, the Teen Mom stars spoke about their decision to share their adoption experience on 16 and Pregnant, as well as the challenges they continue to face as birth parents.
“No one really saw that happen before in real time,” Tyler said of his and Cate’s birth parent experience being documented on TV in 2009. “And then when we got chosen to be on ‘Teen Mom,’ and now following the aftermath of an adoption, we never got to see that ever on [reality] TV or in real time either.”
As fans of ‘Teen Mom’ know, Cate and Tyler’s relationship with Carly’s parents has continued to sour over the years, with the ‘Teen Mom’ stars often venting about the situation on both MTV and social media, much to the dismay of Brandon and Teresa, who have asked the reality TV couple to not post about them or Carly online.
Tyler and Cate’s rants often garner comments criticizing them for not respecting Carly and her parents’ wishes; however, Tyler claimed in September that he and Cate are forced to express their feelings in a public manner in order for Carly to be able to see that they “always tried” to keep communication open between them and her.
While the couple– who are parents to young daughters Nova, Vaeda and Rya– were initially told they would have an “open adoption” with Carly, they revealed earlier this year they that Carly’s parents had cut off communication with them and that the yearly visits between their two families had ceased. Despite the pushback, Cate and Tyler are doubling down on their decision to share their adoption struggles with their millions of social media followers.
“ … all we can do is really just share our story and continue to share the facts regarding adoption,” Tyler said this week. “ … at the end of the day, adoption equal trauma.
“It’s trauma for the adoptee, it’s trauma for the adoptive parents and it’s trauma for the birth parents,” he added.
Cate and Tyler said they have not pursued legal action to contact Carly, partly because they fear that doing so may take a toll on Carly, but also because they realize that Brandon and Teresa are ultimately the ones who are responsible for making decisions when it comes to Carly.
“Not being able to be involved, it’s that power dynamic, which is so hard, because we can say how we feel, and we can say our wishes and wants, and we can put ourselves in their shoes constantly, but at the end of the day, they hold on to all the control,” Cate said.
Meanwhile, when asked on social media in September if Brandon and Teresa had taken any legal action to silence him and Cate from (continuously) blasting them online, Tyler said they hadn’t, but he “would welcome that challenge” if Carly’s parents sought it out.
While it doesn’t appear that Cate and Tyler plan to take any legal action themselves to regain contact with Carly, they both believe that potential birth parents should listen to the adoption experiences of others in order to know what they’re getting into before deciding to place their child for adoption.
“Be curious about stuff that may challenge your way of thinking about it,” Tyler said. “No matter what, learning about adoptee trauma is what’s going to better inform birth parents on how to move forward and what’s better going to inform adoptive parents.”
Cate added that, while she doesn’t regret the choice she made as a teenager, she wishes she would have had a better understanding of the decision she was making.
“I just wish I was more educated as a young child,” she said. “And I mean, let’s face it, we were children, but I do wish that I was more educated on it all, because I probably would have made different decisions.”
Cate said this week that she hopes Carly will one day watch her adoption story in order to see it all from her and Tyler’s perspective.
“I love her so much that I knew that she could not stay with me and I wanted her to have better,” she said.
On Wednesday, Tyler posted screenshots to his Instagram Story of messages he’d received from adoptees commending him (and Cate) for opening up about their adoption story with USA Today. Tyler told followers that for every “negative/ignorant comment, there are at least 100 messages” from people who agree with what he and Cate have to say about adoption.
“ … If your adoption experience has been a good & healthy one, that’s amazing!” Tyler continued. “But that doesn’t negate any of the stories/feelings of adoptees who didn’t share that same experience! & if you have no experience or relationship to adoption, then your comment/opinion really holds no value here … .”
In a follow-up Instagram Story, Tyler shared more screenshots of the positive feedback he’s received on social media, adding that, “adoptees deserve a voice over EVERYONE else!”
“Their experiences, feelings & opinions regarding adoption, should ALWAYS remain the PRIORITY, because they are the ones MOST affected by it,” he wrote.
(Photos: MTV; Instagram)
63 Responses
I’m so tired of people coddling these two. They may not have completely understood when they were teens, but they are full grown adults at this point and CONTINUE to do what they were explicitly asked NOT to do and even said they don’t care about B&T’s wishes in regards to THEIR child.
“oh they were saving their child from their toxic parents”. Yes, great. And then had three more children that they had around all of that toxicity. So they get no kudos for that either.
And obviously C&T are the problem here, they admitted themselves that Carly’s brother’s bio mom continues to have a wonderful relationship w/ B&T and gets to see their son regularly.
Tyler’s most recent public attack of Theresa and ? has confirmed for me that all of their exploitation of Carley is motivated solely by money. While many, especially women, grieve the “loss” of their child and may remember and make the child’s birthday each year, it isn’t normal for the birth parents to make the day – 15 years later – with a cake and a family dinner, as if the child were dead.
If C&at really cares more about Carley than the money, they would not publicly call out and insult her birth parents. I do wonder if these rants occur before their new contract negotiations start. I also wonder if they stay on the show simply to show that giving up the child has ramifications that continue long after the child is gone.
I now think their motivation has nothing to do with Carley but is solely to get more money.
They’re just trying to still use her to stay on the show. I’m sure they regret the adoption and hate how things have turned but their behavior and treatment of each other hasn’t been the best. Look how often Ty put down Cate. When she showed texts between her and the adopted parents she was just going on about the kids she still has at home, not really asking how Carly was. She should have put Carly first and tossed in a simple thing about how the other kids are well. Not blast with photos and long texts.
Whole situation though feels there’s more to the story than they’re sharing.
Imagine how much trauma Carly would have if she hadn’t been put up for adoption and grew up around Butch and April.
Cate didn’t fully understand the decision she was making because she was 16 years old and put herself in a situation where she’d need to make an adult decision.
Firstly – they aren’t adoptees so how do they know about that side of the trauma.
Secondly – these idiots still don’t understand what an open adoption is, and at this point it’s exhausting.
You can’t educate the terminally stupid.
Exactly. How can they speak to adoptees’ trauma? How entitled to act like they get to speak for Carly when they don’t even know her? And it’s not their right to know her.
So immature. When you give your child up for adoption, you’re not entitled to updates. I was adopted and I’m old now and have still never met my real parents. That’s not the way it works and these two have gotten more than they deserve from the adoptive parents. Grow up. Live with your decision. And stop harassing this poor family.
If you back and watch the first season the always said they wanted an open adaptation when their adoption agent asked what that looked like to them they said they wanted to be able to send her birthday cards get updates and pictures and get to see her they were lied to. When they interviewed the prospective parents they would tell them all that and Brandon and Teresa agreed. Based on the law in their state I don’t know how the adoption is even legal. They were under age and one of their parents had to sign the paperwork to be legal none did. Because of that they couldn’t hand the baby to B&T in the hospital and had to meet them off hospital property. They were young lied to and taken advantage of. B&T should be ashamed to go back on their word but then again they exactly what they wanted at the expense of to young scared kids.
Brandon and Teresa never agreed to let them see Carly whenever they wanted to. Almost no adoptive parent would blanket agree to that. Cate and Tyler knew that they weren’t guaranteed visits, especially after the first five years. That’s been acknowledged several times. B&T didn’t go back on their word and have been very generous with access to Carly. And, you should probably know that Cate and Tyler never actually bothered sending Carly birthday cards and presents, even though they were allowed to. Tyler’s mother does, but C&T don’t. Instead, they have fake birthday parties for Carly and make Nova blow, out the candles, all while the cameras roll.
Except they did send her things. 🙄
Maybe sometimes they sent things, but who could EVER forget that sh*t show of a visit where they missed part of the visit with Carly because they couldn’t be bothered finishing their scrapbook on time even though they had more that enough time to get it done. For all their bitching about Branden and Theresa and not getting to see Carly, they missed part of that visit because they prioritized finishing that scrapbook over actually visiting Carly!!!!! There’s absolutely no reason they couldn’t have either finished it on time, or if not, finished it later and sent it afterwards so they could spend as much time with Carly as possible!!! For all the crap they constantly spew about it, when they had the chance to spend time with Carly, they missed half of it!!!!! WTF!!!!!
You worry legal action would take its toll on her but THIS won’t?!?
Can these two just stop already? Brandon and Teresa did not lie or take advantage of them at any point. After their last tirade, I went back and rewatched their episode just to make sure I wasn’t remembering incorrectly. Honestly, while Dawn was maybe too positive and didn’t prep them for some of the struggles, even she didn’t lie to them and clearly explained that the terms of an open adoption were not legally binding and completely up to the adoptive parents. Even the agreement they signed said that. The agreement was also to have annual visits for the first five years, Brandon and Teresa went above and beyond that for years after and even allowed Carly to be in their wedding, but it was just never enough for entitled ass Catelynn and Tyler.
They’re the ones causing Carly and her parents trauma. They’ve caused most of their own trauma because they’re the ones that have destroyed the relationship by violating every boundary Brandon and Teresa set, even and talking shit about them even though they’ve been saints with how many chances they’ve given.
They haven’t pursued legal action with B & T because they legally have zero rights. This was not an “open adoption”. I don’t know why C & T ride so hard for Dawn because she didn’t explain anything to them. It was specifically written as we saw later. I think for the first year they agreed to get pictures every 3 months. Then there was a dvd requested of Carly until she was 5 years old. There were very specific terms. And ones that teenagers wouldn’t understand. Dawn knew that. She probably talked to them more than their own parents regarding this adoption.
I sympathize with the fact that there was really no adult guiding them through this legal process. However what they are doing now will in the long run cause Carly more pain. They constantly keep B & T and Carly on their social media. They do interviews about Carly. They discuss Carly on the show. Tyler can say that he is doing it so Carly knows that they always “tried”. Unfortunately what Carly will see is Cate & Ty disrespecting her parents. They repeatedly violated requests to keep Carly’s life private. They are thinking only of themselves at this point. Carly is a teenager and I’m sure wants to be a normal one. With the internet her story is everywhere. I’m sure people at school have brought it up to her for her entire life.
If Carly wants to see them she will. I wonder if Cate & Ty ever thought about the fact that had they respected B & T’s wishes there is a high probability that they still would be involved to some degree with Carly. Instead they just double downed on their views. There are several old episodes where B & T are calmly discussing why they don’t want Carly’s face plastered everywhere or why they don’t want her discussed on Teen Mom and Ty is just a complete asshole. “I DON’T AGREE MAYBE I WANT TO TALK ABOUT HER. MAYBE THATS MY RIGHT. WE GAVE HER TO YOU BUT BIOLOGICALLY SHE IS OURS. I SHOULD BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT HER IF I WANT”. I can understand if you were a teenager but they are adults now and still do the same thing.
Any time they talk about adoption, even if they say they don’t regret it, they make it sound like it’s one of the worst things you could ever possibly do. I understand that it’s a rough experience for everyone involved. I’d love to hear things from Carly’s perspective one day. Cate & Ty aren’t really giving her the opportunity to have her privacy and grow up as “normally” as possible when they’re constantly putting past business out there. The only way to overcome trauma (god I fkn hate how often they use that word 🙄) is to address it in therapy. If they’re going, they either haven’t worked through it or they need a new provider.
I 100% believe they regret the adoption. I wish they would just admit that. They talk about it all the time, but they never once have just admitted that their shitty parents were right. They do regret it. They wanted to give their child a better life, because they saw a better life as lots of gifts around the tree and all the things they lacked. They gave up their daughter and then basically won the lottery. I think the mental health crisis Cate always goes through is due to the regret. I’m sure she wishes she had listened to her mother. I feel so sad for both of them. They did what they thought was best at the time. No one could have predicted those two would have a bright financial future. It’s a sad twist of fate. They can’t move past it and heal with MTV in their faces wanting them to speak about their biggest regret in life. But, I also think if they just admitted that they wish they hadn’t done it, it would be a relief. I almost think they aren’t allowed to admit it because they were public supporters of adoption.
See but that’s the thing, their adoption story is what made them unique, so who’s to say they would have even been on 16 and pregnant or been chosen to continue on teen mom if they didn’t have that drama as part of their story? They more than likely would have just been another sad teen parent story passed over, not on tv, not millionaires and cait would have brought Carly up living in that dysfunctional trailer with butch and April, with Tyler nowhere to be found.
Tyler is such an entitled @$$… get some professional help. Every time he goes through his mania, he does this. Maybe he should actually get on bipolar meds.
Tyler and Catelyn need a professional to talk to and to sit down and actually read the adoption contract. I’m pretty sure visits were only guaranteed to age 5. Brandon and Theresa have gone out of their way to be kind and accommodating. I would have sent a cease and desist a long time ago if I’d been them.
This duo irritates me. CARLY sees the messages that C&T delivered! She seeing it, I promise, and guess what? She hates you both with all her heart, if she’s anything like my kid. Enjoy expressing your disdain for Carly’s parents by sharing your thoughts about them publicly, sharing photos you were advised not to share, and writing down private memories—post all you have online because you will only ever receive that! You’ll be wondering, “What does Carly look like now?” for the rest of your life, and you’ll never find out! Thats yours, foolish pair with no morals and drenched in colesterol.
Cate & Tyler are two of the most entitled people I’ve ever seen. B&T made very simple requests of them at the beginning and they have refused to follow even the most basic requests. B&T still didn’t cut contact even after all of the trash talking and disrespect Tyler and Cate have shown them. IMO this all boils down to control. Tyler especially cannot stand not calling the shots and not being in control, he even told B&T that when they ask him not to do something it makes him want to do it even more. That is the mentality of a child. Brandon and Teresa have been more than generous with these two yet it’s still not enough for Cate and Tyler. C&T are the type of children that when you give them an inch they take a mile. They’re pouting because B&T won’t bend to their will & they’re hurting Carly in the process. They both need to grow up & worry about the kids they do have. Oh and these two went how long without contact or sending gifts or letters or even asking about how Carly is but they’ll throw hissy fits over visits and social media posts. That right there shows me everything I need to know about how much they don’t actually care about Carly.
I agree 100%. I think T and C feed off of the sympathetic attention they get off these rants. Forever airing their grievances equals staying in the public eye which equals money. I think they’re insufferable.
Of course it’s traumatic to place your child for adoption. That’s obvious. But it’s a necessary traumatic sacrifice that a lot of people choose to make for the well being of their child.
These two talk out of both sides of their money. They claim they went public (as if they have been for 15 years) so that Carly would know “the truth.” But, Tyler also said that he’s not worried about Carly being hurt by the things he’s said because her parents don’t let her have a phone or internet access. So, which is it?? Is this for her or not? Because it seems like this has nothing to do with Carly and what she wants. It seems like Cate and Tyler are using this child for their own monetary benefit again while completely disregarding her parents’ wishes.
*both sides of their mouth
Both sides of their money works too, because you know they’ve dragged out this adoption story for 15 years to keep those MTV checks coming in, plus they’re selling stories to the tabloids. They’re despicable. They both need to get off the internet and go find jobs to support their “not Carly” daughters because that Teen Mom money won’t last forever.
I feel bad for Nova, Vaeda and Rya. They have to know that they’ll never measure up to Carly in the eyes of their parents and that’s a hurt like no other. Shame on Tyler and Cate for being such childish, selfish assholes.
Brandon and Theresa did more to harm adoption. I don’t know how Bethany is still in business. There might be a few agencies with Bethany in the name. They did not live up to their promise. They are seeing to Carly’s needs. They are not monsters. Adoptive parents know at some point their child will be an adult asking about their birth parents and will consider how they were treated from an entirely different perspective. They will be in for a rude awakening by the time she is 30.
I find it upsetting Catelyn’s mom didn’t want the agency or this couple to have contact with her own 16 year old daughter. Yet they did anyway. The agency just needed a baby for the fee they would get. Having adopted but did not pick domestic program but still went to overlapping classes on the matter the stuff promised them seemed more closed adoption. Did they even know? She is right. She was not given all the information. The couple knew about the show before it was final X days after signing. We saw her handed over on the street. Definitely know before the handoff. They can’t just say we didn’t realize it would be on tv more than a year later. Just like C and T can’t say we didn’t know we really could not see her from time to time like said so we want to change the contract. B&T still see the couple as a couple of kids. Catelynn and Tyler’s parents treated disrespectfully in all this. If anyone needs someone to have another’s back how about the teen’s parents. How can adults violate the directives of the teen parents, how can the agency? Are they kids with good judgement to give them the baby but adults with bad judgement that they are complaining? They can’t be both.
No one should be mean to the couple in their private spaces. Out and about. I know this couple hoped the pair would split and they would maybe be dealing with just mom and photos until she partnered later on and had kids she would keep she could focus on. We were told in the classes it was not uncommon for the AP to be the ones looking for bio parents or initiating the gatherings. Cause the kid might want that, want to know siblings, imagine life if they stayed and want the kid to know they have their support to do that. That adoption world was far more open from the start from before Carly’s birth, that has been standard. I do not understand how the prospective adoptive parents were calling so many of the shots from the beginning. This seemed like and a 1980’s adoption not one from this century.
The real tragedy is it was mostly money the reason they didn’t parent, the show gave the money that they would have needed to be okay. There was no concern they would lose custody.
Whatever you think of C&T they have every right to caution people against placing a child for adoption and for speaking out they were too young and their representation was violated in that her mom opposed and that they pair were not treated ethically. There was a conflict of interest among the people meant to keep things fair for them. They were not treated ethically. They can say they chose the wrong couple. They have also been clear Carly has been treated well. But the pair agreed to more than that.
The only couple together from the series at least that season. The one who placed. They would not have the other 3 if they broke up. The other parents stuck together and don’t really want to be, all because they had a child. Other parents. Step kids all over the place and half siblings. Days disrupted to go spend the night or weekend somewhere else. Cautionary tale.
In Brandan & Teresa’s defense, 16 & pregnant was supposed to just be a 1 time thing. There was no Teen Mom & I think if Tyler & Cate & thought they would get on a show after having Carly, they never would have given her up.
Tyler ad Cate have done more harm to adoption, and continue to do so, on a daily basis, than anyone I have ever seen. I have a lot (years and years) of experience in that world, and I have seen people , how they behave, how they speak, how they react, etc… from all ranges of the spectrum. People like Tyler and Cate make it far more difficult for people, especially children, to deal with adoption and all it can entail. Not everyone is going to have a positive experience (no matter their role, adopter, adoptee, biological family, etc), but people like these two ensure that more people will have a negative one.
No one has ever said that everything in their experience with adoption was always on the up and up, but Brandon and Theresa had nothing at all to do with that. In fact, they bent over backwards, and still do, to accommodate them, because they know and can see just how difficult such decisions can be (for anyone, of any age) and the fact that neither one of them had the support of friends and family. They give them hella wiggle room to be douchecanoes with the hope that at some point they would both grow up. They are no longer teenagers, it’s time to stop acting like it. It’s time to start taking responsibility for their own actions and the effects they have on others, primarily the three girls they have, and Carly. They have no right, at all, to foist all this stress and bullshit on a group of literal children, just because they can continue to make money off it. Now who is exploiting children? Tyler and Cate, that’s who. They have become the very people you’re denigrating by using their children, and Carly (who is NOT their child) as pawns in some weird game to garner attention and money.
Carly reduced, and at times cut, contact with them. That speaks volumes about where she is in her life right now and what she both needs and wants. These two have NEVER respected her or her wishes, much less those of her actual parents (which they are not).
Clearly you have absolutely no personal experience whatsoever in the world of adoption, because almost none of what you said, actually applies (in this case, or any). Knowing people who are in this world is not the same as actually being in it. Brandon and Theresa have actually done a lot of good for adoption-which you’d be able to see if you really understood it.
Very well said
Adoption is permanent and C&T got more than most, yet have constantly broke the wishes of Carlys parents..when you give up a child for Adoption..you have zero rights and yet B&T gave these bio parents more than they had to..these two chose adoption because of their dysfunctional families and yet, they took April on visits, and she proceeded to get drunk..that is likely part of the reason Carlys parents have gone no contact 😉
I know people don’t like them for various reasons but it doesn’t make what they’re saying any less true. Catelynn and Tyler chose adoption because their own parents had failed them and they wanted more for their child than they could provide at the time. It wasn’t because they didn’t love her. It was a sacrifice they made for their child because that’s what parents do. I get that Brandon and Teresa want privacy but their kid’s biological parents are reality TV stars and they just have to deal with that and sacrifice what they want because that’s what parents do. The well being of the child should always come first. It’s very hard to image a situation where cutting off contact with her 3 biological siblings wouldn’t be traumatic.
The well being of the child is decided by the legal guardians. C&T have no parental rights to make any decisions for Carly. If they cared at all for Carly they would respect B&T decisions. The way the behave on line makes me think they have no regard for Carly’s feelings whatsoever. They are being very selfish.
Brandon and Teresa do not have to deal with Cate and Tyler being reality stars. They didn’t sign up for that. They signed up for a one time documentary style show about adoption, no one knew what this show would turn into. Cate and Tyler clearly have no problem exploiting their children for money but Brandon and Teresa have every right not to want to exploit theirs. Carly is legally Brandon and a Teresa’s daughter, they are not coparenting with C&T. The fact that C&T are willing to risk the relationship with Carly and her parents just so they can talk about her and post about her should show you that it’s not actually about Carly for them. They shouldn’t be doing this to a 15 year old girl. Her life is none of the public’s business yet C&T keep making it our business. I’m actually appalled by their behavior and self righteousness, it’s actually quite disgusting that they’re making Carly’s life such a spectacle.
Catelynn and Tyler have said repeatedly that they are speaking publicly because they want to make sure Carly knows that she was loved and wanted. That is a huge deal for a lot of kids who are adopted… Especially considering they went on to get married and have more children. Nothing they have said seems to be out of malice but rather trying to mitigate any pain and resentment around being adopted. The only way they can make that known is publicly because contact was cut. Brandon and Teresa signed up for adoption and dealing with the unexpected is part of being a parent. They don’t have to deal with C&T but they should for their kids sake.
But, that’s absurd. You realize that right?? They’ve been going on and on about how they’ve been cheated for months now. They’re giving multiple interviews ($$$) and drumming up social media drama. This is no longer about making sure Carly knows they love her. This is not how you show someone you love them. Besides, these interviews are the literal reason why they were cut off from Carly in the first place! The only request that has ever been made is to keep Carly out of the public eye. And that’s all these two do! After 15 years, she is still the center of their storylines despite them having three other daughters they can use for money. Their claims about these interviews being for Carly’s sake is pure bs when her parents only cut off access because of these types of public displays.
Carly has tried to reduce and cut contact with them. She has chosen not to meet up with them, not be in constant contact and doesn’t want to be brought up every single time they need to sell their story to another media outlet. That speaks volumes about their (lack of) character and inability to think beyond themselves. Carly has CHOSEN to tell them, in words or action, that she understands where they are and how they feel, but she doesn’t want involved.
It doesn’t matter, at that point, what Tyler and Cate want, because Carly has made her wishes known. If they can’t respect that, they don’t respect her and don’t deserve an iota of respect in return. It’s as big of a deal for children who are adopted to know they are respected as it is they are loved. Carly knows she’s loved, now she needs to be respected, full stop.
How do you know what Carly wants? Do you know her personally? Honestly, I think all these people on here talking for her saying she hates her bio parents and doesn’t want to talk to them is worse than what C&T are doing. At least they are her bio parents and have a connection to her. Adoption is hard and it isn’t straightforward. There can be messy feelings from all sides especially when the bio parents were so young like C&T and the adoptive parents are complete strangers.
Because she literally cut contact with them, even they have said that. It was her choice not to meet up this year-she had other things she wanted to do. That was after she had already slowed contact with them and limited it to very minimal contact and eventually no contact. Carly made that choice herself. Even these two idiots have said that they can’t contact her because she won’t answer them and her parents (Brandon and Theresa) had to block them from further contact because they ignored Carly. It’s not rocket surgery. I’m not really sure why people are just ignoring the fact that both B&T and T&C have said the same thing about her not wanting contact at this time. It’s a pretty crucial piece of the puzzle.
I don’t think Carly hates them, I think she wants to be left alone to sort what is already a trying time for teens out and navigate these years without constantly being reminded of, well, everything T&C have said and done or be constantly in the limelight. It’s extremely common for adopted children, can happen at any age, and sometimes it’s something they stick with for life. Sometimes, it’s just a season of their life when they want to just…be, whatever they might define that as. It’s important to remember that it’s okay for them to make these choices, as Carly has. They aren’t responsible if their choice to limit or cut contact hurts someone’s feelings (as it clearly does T&C).
Absolutely nothing about adoption, or even fostering, is clear cut or cookie cutter. It runs the total gambit really and can change at any time. It won’t be the exact same experience even for all parties involved in the same case. But if an adopted child says “I want to limit my contact to when/if I desire it”, that should be respected. When adoptive parents tell biological family to back the hell off and let the child be, that should be respected (assuming the child is being raised well in a loving family and has chosen to go low or no contact, as Carly is/has).
Biology doesn’t make you family, it just gives you a connection via DNA.
I could be wrong, but I can’t recall it being confirmed that it was Carley that cut off contact. It was definitely suggested that happened by some posters but was not confirmed whether it was Brandon/Teresa who cut off contact or if it was indeed Carley.
C&T are not her parents. And if B&T would have known they’d be obsessed with Carley for the rest of their natural born lives, they may have thought twice.
These two little self obsessed twits are ruining Carly’s life. She should change her name when she’s 18.
Nobody owes C&T shit, much less some weird ass co-parenting relationship they think they do.
@The Ashley: I wish you wouldn’t post Brandon and Theresa’s last name. The article is all about how they want their privacy, yet you post something that’s never been on the show. Even if it’s been leaked elsewhere, doesn’t mean it should be fair game to post constantly. Plenty of people are reading your words and learning it for the first time.
@sammy ~ brandon and theresa have participated in cover stories for multiple publications. that’s hardly ‘leaking’ their last name. also, it’s a super common surname.
however, it was SUPER nice of you to take time to criticize the owner of this site. 🙄🙄
@TheAshley NEVER releases private identifying information that isn’t already out there. She’s gone out of her way to protect people’s privacy many times in the past. Hell, she’s kept PUBLIC information from police reports off this site to protect children. She’s one of the only gossip bloggers who has even a shred of decency that I can think of. Their last name has been public for over a decade. Calm down…or maybe get off the gossip blog? People Magazine might be more your speed.
Crazy Teresa and Brandon asked ONE THING from them to not plaster Carly life for national audience and they can’t even do that. Now they wonder why they cut them off. They used all their kids as paychecks. Now on only fans wouldn’t want my kid anywhere near him after selling hisittle pecker for cash. How bout getting REAL JOB that u use your brain besides your pecker
The clearly see themselves and their interests as the most important part of this equation, hence they are the “victims”. Let’s be real, in an alternate universe where TM ended after one season and these two goobers didn’t make millions, living their best white trash life, they would realize they made the best decision for their child and be happy for her. Instead, they hit pay dirt with that never ending crap show and realize they can afford to screw up 20 kids if they wanted. Now, they are “using their voice” to scare people away from adoption. Like not everyone is going to hit the Lottery like you nerds and fall ass backwards into money, making adoption a less desirable option. They really are delusional and never matured past 16.
This is an interesting perspective I never once thought that Carly wanted nothing to do with them, but I do agree had they never made millions from the show they probably would have a different outlook on things.
That’s what pisses me off the most. They are actively trying to scare people away from adoption. My family was founded on my dad being adopted in an open adoption. Shockingly he had a good relationship with both his parents and his birth mother. Mostly because his birth mother wasn’t an entitled nutcase suffering from main character syndrome. These two idiots should try it.
I agree. Adoption can be wonderful. My grandfather was adopted out of an orphanage. My cousin was adopted and me and my husband are in the process of fostering to adopt. Our foster son wants nothing more than for us to adopt him. Everything to Kate and Ty turns into trauma.
These two are the windiest bitches i’ve ever seen
B & T don’t seem like spiteful people, they would not have cut off contact if Carly didn’t want to or if it wasn’t in her best interests. At 15 I’m sure she would be able to express her own thoughts and feelings on seeing Cate and Tyler and has simply decided she does not want to partake in contact anymore. They need to respect the decision and quit talking about her and causing more “trauma”.
I’m so fed up with these two. If Carly wanted to contact them, SHE WOULD. She has access to the internet, she has friends that could contact them if she couldn’t do that personally.
CARLY DOESN’T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU. Meditate about that and actually parent the 3 not Carlys that you had to replace the original.
Adoption does equal trauma, but usually for the child, which is what matters. Turns out being yanked from the only person you know at birth is a trauma your body remembers.
It’s ultimately about Carly, not them.
You weren’t adopted were you? 🙄 Stop spreading bullshit misinformation. Ignorant comment, almost as bad as the crap the idiot twins keep spewing.
It’s not misinformation, it’s from the research of people a lot smarter than me. And I’m not adopted, but I’m an adoptive parent, so I think it’s important to be informed.
And to be clear, usually the adoption is less traumatic than if the child had stayed with their birth parents. But it’s still trauma to be addressed. We all have trauma to some extent. It’s just important to recognize it and work through it. Adopted children can have codependency issues if the trauma isn’t properly addressed.
Did it ever occur to them that Carly might, idk, actually LIKE being raised by B&T? I know, crazy, right?
She could actually be happy and feel safe with them and maybe even… love them???
It’s very short sighted and presumptuous of C&T to assume that she’s traumatized.
Any trauma inflicted is 100% from C&T and their constant crashing out.
Carley can see how trashtic these fools are and thank her lucky stars every day that B&T kept her from being raised by two hillbillies from th3 sticks of Indiana.
This is something I think about whenever these two idiots come up. Imagine being what sounds like a very sheltered kid growing up in a pretty affluent area from all accounts and your birth parents rolls up in a cut off tank top in a cloud of vape. Just the two trashiest basic strangers who have done nothing but make your life about them and claim some mystical connection you probably don’t feel while posting photos of you on the internet. I think that would be absolutely mortifying.
Weird how they say that adoptees’ feelings should always be the priority, while they ignore Carly and her feelings, opinions, experiences…the mere fact that she exists and is a human being.
It was Carly’s choice to stop contacting them. It was Carly’s choice to not meet up with them this past year. It was Carly’s choice to distance herself from the…waves arms maniacally… shitshow that these two have created. But, sure Tyler your feelings, as someone who nutted and then told his (at the time) gf that he wouldn’t stick around if she kept the baby, should be on the forefront.
I have experiences with adoption that cover the entire spectrum, so I can empathize with certain aspects of how everyone involved feels, things they might experience and a whole lot of that isn’t always very pleasant. That said, these two are the poster children for why adoption can be a good thing. They behave as if someone stole Carly from them, and that someone is continuing to keep her away-despite the fact that she WANTS to be away! Tyler, you made a choice, a good choice, even if a personally painful choice, to place Carly and her needs above your own. You can have all the feelings you want about it, but what you don’t have a right to do, is dump those feelings on Carly. Because she DOES see what you say and do, even if she doesn’t want to, and her actual parents try to prevent it. You make certain she does. I guarantee you that is causing her pain. I have kids who experience similar things and you’re NOT helping her at all by constantly reminding her that you didn’t want her (because that too is part of your story). She doesn’t need to be burdened with believing she’s hurting you-which you do with every story you post/share/monetize. She’s a teenager for fuck’s sake. She’s going to likely take everything to heart and it’s going to make navigating life as an adopted child, a teenager, a girl, with biological parents who can’t stay the fuck out of the limelight and keep her name out their damn mouths, so much more difficult. Just stop, for crying out loud, it’s not that damn hard.
Your poor girls need parents that love them as much as they love Carly. So, fucking stop making Carly into a lost appendage and take better care of your family… financially, physically, mentally…just deal with yo shit man! Quit making money off Carly’s pain, assholes.
I’m super curious as to what are your experiences with adoption you keep touting?
Crazy idea.
Adoption ≠ Trauma
Retelling your adoption story for profit on national TV over a thousand times, and never allow to move past it ≠ Trauma.
They need professional help, and to get off SM. This is helping them, it certainly isn’t helping Carly, its not helping B&T. So if its just hurting everyone, including the child, maybe just stop. She knows you want to talk, she knows you want her to reach out, when/if she ever wants to she knows. So just stop.
Not even going to read this article, but are they tired of Kail’s insufferableness getting the spotlight so their insufferable asses had to pipe up?
💯 they are all so unbelievably insufferable